Mirroring
Let’s talk…
“Let’s talk about you and me
Let’s talk about all the good things
And the bad things that may be”
So, why focus on relationships for the month of May?
Until May 8th, there was a planetary pileup in Taurus with the Sun and Mercury in the thrall of Venus’ court. Our thoughts and self focus circled around relationships, and circumstances that challenged us to be embodied — filling and utilizing our flesh envelopes to interface with manifest experience in order to answer What do I need to do for myself to feel stable, secure, in control of my resources?
THEN Mercury in Gemini started calling the shots once Venus joined it and the North Node. Planets in Gemini ask the question Does this mirror (especially colleagues, close friends, siblings, self directed projects) show me how I understand myself and who I am in my immediate environment? The Sun, still in Taurus until the 20th, shifts its focus from self to other — comprehending embodiment in relation and interaction with other bodies that can mirror back identifying and qualifying cues. Unlike last year, when we were sinking deeper and deeper in the pandemic and cut off from the usual activities that would allow us these explorations, this year, many of us find that we can again begin to contemplate IRL encounters.
So, let’s talk about using astrology to navigate relating and relationships — my favorite astrological topic.
It’s All in the Approach
As many of you know, what truly drove me to deepen my astrological studies was a need to understand relationships. My high school best friend suggested that we study Linda Goodman’s Sun Signs so that we would become more adept at seducing boys once we’d escaped all-girls Catholic school for the freedom of college. She found herself a husband, and I wound up an astrologer.
Over the decades, I’ve played with various techniques to delve into what causes relationships to form, what they do for and to its participants, and, of course, how they will unfold in the future. Questions about relationships and requests for relationship readings predominate the queries I field in my practice; and, as many of you know, I’m pretty stingy about the latter. Why?
I’ll come clean — I used to jump straight into relationship astrology at the started of dating or when that first point of friction hits. Isn’t that what astrology is for? A tool to better navigate our interactions with the external world and others? Who doesn’t want to know — Are we really compatible? Is this worth my time? Will this really work out or just wind up like my other relationships? BUT, after countless synastry (the comparison of two charts overlaid on each other to see how the individual’s placements interact) analyses, parsing through composite (that shows the midpoints of the partners’ placements and supposedly the timbre of the relationship) and Davison (that results from looking at the midpoint in space and time between the partners charts and can be treated as a third entity that receives synastric stimulus as well as used to forecast for the relationship) charts, pulling horary after horary, has any of it helped me or my clients actually navigate a wiser or more functional course through the unknown country of engaging in relationship?
Sure, knowledge is power but neither knowledge nor power is wisdom — nor do they necessarily lead to wisdom. Wisdom seems to form via experience framed by discernment and perspective…and, as is the case with embodied living, we need to cultivate wisdom in order to make beneficial and productive use of tools and technology such as astrology.
So, how does one start? Here’s how I approach with work when working with a client.
Needs, Wants, Dealbreakers…
Firstly, the single most important chart is the natal chart. For my money, you could really just stop here. It is absolutely the gold standard by which you can see everything you need to know to functionally engage in every iteration of relationship (romantic, sibling, parental, business, work, school, etc) that will come your way during this lifetime. It contains your Relationship “Company Deck” that communicates your relationship mission and vision statements, imparts an understanding of what role relationship plays in your journey, provides the metrics to determine whether or not a perspective partner and partnership truly are compatible with you and your life, and what windows in time that relationship might unlock the potentialities of your chart on your path to self/Self acceptance and realization.
The first place to look is how your Sun and Moon describe the interaction of your needs: respectively, what you need from yourself for identity integration and what you require from others and your environment for homeostasis. Recognizing and accepting these needs, wants, dealbreakers and the challenges and strengths posed by the harmony or disharmony of these two sets of directives set the ground rules of any interaction.
Twinning and Re-Entering Society
How do we use this very pared down and targeted approach to re-enter social interaction as pandemic restrictions ease?
While Venus, Mercury, and the North Node are piled into Gemini, it’s all about twinning, mirroring, active listening. Knowing your ground rules, you can use these to see if you feel resonantly mirrored in your interactions.
Does relating with this person reflect you in a way that you recognize an authentic understanding of yourself? If your visceral response is “yes”, observe how that’s bringing a sense of stability and solidity. If the answer is “no”, examine what are the possible sources of instability or disembodiment. In either case, look to see who is being reflected back to you.
When we describe people as “twinning” in current parlance, it isn’t about cloning or being an exact copy. It’s about mirroring in such a way that we consciously inhabit similarities draw us together but allow for the realization of differences that lead to self awareness and acceptance.
Let’s Delve Deeper!
To kick off my Clubhouse astrology series on astrology and relationships, please join me next Wednesday, May 19th.
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SESSION 1 | LET’S WORKSHOP THE DAVISON
@2p PDT for fellow astrologers and astrology students we’ll focus on the Davison — maybe with some fun guests! Are they the gold standard for relationship delineation?
Click here to add the event to your calendar.
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SESSION 2 | LET’S TALK RELATIONSHIP ASTRO - PART 1
@9:15p PDT for clients and astro enthusiasts, the kick off to this series off with my favorite topic — relationship astrology! First up, the natal chart. If you’re interested in your chart being used as an anonymized demo, contact me.
Click here to add the event to your calendar.
CURRENT TAKEAWAY
